Lived Experience Forum

[Bossmum]

So i work 6 days a week, no one else I work with does that many days. I am the only person with young kids that works there, other people in their 20s. I asked my boss if someone else could fill in coz my kids needed me and my mum needs a break from looking after them every night! 

Basically he said no, I have to go to work, and tell my kids he will come down with a belt so they behave( jokingly) but not funny and tell my mum sorry!?! So I'm obliged to go in now?? I don't think that's fair at all or am I being a sook? 

[hanami]

Hi @Bossmum 

So sorry this is happening! What an awful thing for your boss to say. Not funny AT ALL!

I feel like you aren't being listened to and have the genuine need for time off. Do you have someone else at work you can ask for advice?

Thinking of you 

Hanami

[Bossmum]

No not really, I never have anyone I can ask for advice. 

Now I don't feel ok about leaving my kids coz they need me as home life isn't comfortable or healthy. I don't want to loose my job and let my boss down but then really he doesn't care about my life. I'm replaceable but I'm not replaceable for my kids. My daughter is so sad all the time and I hate leaving her coz she gets so upset... I feel so out of control with my life, my mum, my work, my brother, my partner, my kids... I used to have my shit all together, I can do it I just can't take that first step for some reason and I hate that I can't and don't understand why when I use to support my own home, car, bills, kids,pets, school shit I even had internet, Foxtel and Netflix oh and air conditioning.  ( none of these things at my mum's house )

Ahhh, but I'm the lazy, useless stupid one! 

[FloatingFeather]

Hi @Bossmum,

It sounds like you have a lot going on - I can read the struggle and sadness in your post. I'm really sorry you are going through this.

Do you have anyone that you can talk to, someone that you feel safe with and you can trust? This would be a lot to go through on your own.

I know myself when things just seem so overwhelming the things I would typically do without a thought seem so hard and seem to require so much effort. Maybe just give yourself some time and kindness and recognise that you have a lot going on. You sound like a really nice person and as you said you can do it as you have done it before! 

Wishing you all the best - hope things improve for you very soon.

FloaitngFeather

[tyme]

@Bossmum , you've made some very good points there. At work, you are replaceable. As a mother, you are not.

I've often heard children say, "I don't want toys. I don't want anything. I want you." This breaks my heart.

Yet I also understand the financial strain providing for your children. 

Which state do you live in? I'm wondering if there are supports you can access in your state?

Also, have you considered looking at other work whereby you can work from home? There are a surplus number of jobs out there. Now it's about finding one to suit you.

Sitting with you through this.