Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Jynx]

Hey @Bluewren57 just a lil tip - if you want someone to be notified that you've replied, you can tag them with the @ symbol - choose (or type then choose) their name from the drop down so it shows up in blue, like this: @Shaz51 @tyme 

Hoarding and OCD, what a combo! Would definitely have a big impact. I'm glad to hear that having that diagnostic label has helped you to make sense of things. 

One of my friends has OCD, and he spoke of it being a response to undiagnosed ADHD and unresolved trauma. From what I've read, OCD is not just the external stuff like compulsions and repetitive behaviours, it's also how intense the intrusive thoughts are. Do you know much about your partner's experiences of stuff like intrusive thoughts, or if they have a history of trauma? 

Not sure if you've already come across it yet, but we do have some info about OCD here. 

[NatureLover]

Hi @Bluewren57 , @tyme  has tagged me in response to your post, as I have OCD and Hoarding Disorder. If I can help you with anything, I will try my best. 

What form does your husband's OCD take? Mine is germophobia, but I also have some counting and checking as well. 

[NatureLover]

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@IluvRosie wrote:

Hi. I am seeking understanding and any advice from others who are carers. I am a carer for my 21 year old daughter. We have been home before, and we now face homelessness again. We don’t have the income needed to pay the high rents, even if they were available. I feel such a failure. I can’t keep her safe.

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@IluvRosie  I am so sorry to hear - I really feel for you 😢

I wonder if you have a local housing advocacy organisation in your area? Your local council should be able to direct you to one if there is one, or you could google. 

I really hope you're able to find some accommodation in time 🤞 

[MedicinalGypsy]

I hope you find a place real soon, I've gone rural and found a studio 🙏 wishing you all the best

[Bluewren57]

@Jynx 

Thank you  I appreciate the tip. I'm finding it a little difficult navigating the chat but I'm learning. 

The diagnosis has shed so much light on many years of struggles.  

I wish we'd know years ago but like so many disorders, not much was recognised or talked about when we were younger.  

The hoarding is a huge issue that has increased over time.  He is well aware of it, hates it & is doing everything he can to stop and to get rid of stuff.  I can see how exhausting it is for him. 

There's been talk of ADHD & also trauma but nothing concrete at this stage. 

Psychs have also mentioned possible ASD but he needs further assessments for all of that, which he's not interested in at the moment.  

Thanks for the link, I've had a look. Very interesting.  

Much appreciated 

[tyme]

Hi @Bluewren57 ,

If you want, we can set up a thread for you to help you navigate the forums a little easier? 

Would you like us to do that? Then all your posts can be kept in one place?

Hope you are okay today.

[Shaz51]

A thread of your own would be helpful for you @Bluewren57 

Thanks @tyme 

My husband has had all those diagnosis and they they think he has ASD also 

[tyme]

Hey @IluvRosie ,

How are you? Hope you are okay.

[Trishcarer]

Hi,

I'm Trish and a carer/ mother to two primary school aged girls with ADHD, ASD level 2 and diagnosed gifted (I hate the "gifted" word as it feels presumptuous). Most Carer supports and forums feel like they are for people carering for other adults and I don't see many parents of younger kids.

We live in regional QLD and I'm at the point of giving up on everything. I feel so disillusioned with every aspect of society.
I'm quickly coming to the realisation that you can fix society or a broken education system with personal therapy so what's the point.  

From the fighting just to get any type of therapist in the first place, to the constant travelling to and from school to see therapists and losing learning time.
It's reaching out to every possible carer support program only to be told we're not disabled enough for help or we're in a blackspot for "community support".

I can't find parents going through similar things as it appears they all home-school and do group activities, where as I'm fighting tooth and nail to keep my kids as mainstream as possible (even though it feels like fighting enviable of them leaving school soon).

I have had catatonic burnout a few times now and don't know how we would have survived if hubby hadn't taken time off work to help me rest. But he can't keep doing that as I can't work between appointments and no oshc that is Autistic safe that I have found.

I don't trust people easily so asking for outside help is so hard for me.

[Friendlyflutter]

Thank you for sharing your story with us @Trishcarer 

It is good to hear that you have a supporting husband and sorry to hear about your bad experience when reaching out for support. 

Hoping you will be able find more support online on this forum and connect with people with similar experience.  😊