Lived Experience Forum

[soppykat]

Hi I was involved in an online *thing* for nearly two years, only to find out that the person didn't like me back the entire time.  I wasted nearly two years waiting for something to happen, but nothing did. It ended up that I liked/possibly loved/him the whole time, but he didn't even care about me at all.  I found out that he was cheating, and didn't even bother to care about this until I made him talk.

All my friends kept saying that it wasn't a real relationship, but it certainly felt like it to me.

I feel like I have wasted nearly two years of my life.  At least I can move on now, but since I am mentally ill, I have already been discriminated.  Stupid relationships 😞

[Paperdaisy]

Hi @soppykat I'm sorry to hear you've had this experience and this person hasn't given you the respect you deserve. As for your friends saying it isn't a real relationship- I think you are the only person who can determine that, as you are the one who was living it. As you said, it felt very real to you and I'm sure the break up feels very real also. I'm sorry you don't feel heard by your friends. Is there anyone who can support you, that will validate your experience and listen to your concerns? It might be worth having a chat to Relationships Australia  as they do a lot of work around respectful relationships. Two years is a long time to be involved with someone and it can be hard seeing that as wasted time but sometimes we have to have these experiences to learn more about ourselves and others and end up in a better place. 💝

[soppykat]

Hi @Paperdaisy - i guess i have learnt from this experience not to assume things anymore lol.

I don't think im going to try online relationships again.  I think I have gotten over the grieving process though, so that is good.

Thank you for replying to my post 🙂