Depression anxiety

[MJG017]

Hi @Lula.  Try not to get too frustrate, do what you can do and your familiarity with the site will grow as you get more used to it.  You don't need to worry about crowding me, i'm always happy to reply to anyone.  And it's nice to know that you found my reply so relatable, I just hope it helped you a bit as well.

It certainly sounds like you are really struggling if you're even struggling to eat.  Although i've been close to there on a few occasions.  I could still eat, but I did it just to get rid of the hunger and stop myself feeling light headed and nauseous... which happens is I haven't had anything to eat for too long.

Of course you're not a bad person.  We've all made mistakes!  I've made plenty and yes, I still make them.  Some things can persist with us for a very long time, even a life time.  It doesn't make us bad, it just means we all have our different struggles that we try our best to overcome.  If they were easy to overcome they wouldn't be called struggles.

I think a lot of us can feel like we're getting no where, but quite often we are... we just don't see it until we make enough progress that something happens that makes us think "oh, things are starting to improve."  So i think the best way to get back up is to keep doing what you're doing.  Keep posting and sharing what your feeling and things will hopefully start to improve for you.  If you do have one of those days where you just feel too tired to do anything then don't force yourself or feel bad for just wanting to rest.  It's probably the bodies way of saying "I just need to take it easy for a bit."  So it doesn't hurt to listen to it when you can and you should feel bad for it.

If things still feel like they're getting too difficult then maybe give the Sane support line a call as @Jynx suggested.  You may need to just hear someone's voice.  I certainly do every now and then.

You may be surprised to hear that i'm not quite a senior yet.  I'll be 54 in December.  I take it as a compliment you think I'm older from my writing.  Maybe I've just had to deal with a lot in my 50 add years... who knows.

I hope you're feeling better very soon.  Let us know either way.  Take care of yourself Lula.

[Lula]

Hi @Jynx and thanks so much for your reply. I’m guessing you are a female, even though you haven’t acknowledged it. Somehow the way you write (speak) is telling me that. But if you don’t want to say one way or the other that’s fine - all good Jynx.

Yes, I am exhausted, overwhelmed even, but I guess it’s the survival instincts kicking in, as they do in these tough times - I will get there 🤞.
I can’t think any other way can I ?

I have been seeing a psychologist - I had to get a new referral at the end of last week, but the demand on these people where I live is high, so I couldn’t get an appointment till the end of next week. Likewise GPs - I thought of making an appointment today but the wait for that appointment is only a few days short of the psychologist 🤷‍♀️

I talked with an old friend who lives interstate a little while ago so that has helped for tonight at least.

I do have things I’m grateful for Jynx, past and present, but there are big things that I haven’t had and most people do, so I try not to think about them too much. It is what it is.

I want to have a good cry, but something stops that happening. And I’d love to have a shoulder to lean against or cry on, but there isn’t one.

Time to go for now, bye Jynx

[Jynx]

Hi @Lula - you might be surprised to learn that I'm non-binary; I don't feel like a man or a woman, and I use they/them pronouns! It's okay if this is a bit of a foreign concept for you, it was for my parents! But I was born/socialised as female, which might be why my writing appears this way. I tell you what, I also get a bit of a sense for people's gender by how they write, it's really interesting that we can sorta tell, hey! 

Oh glad you've got an appt coming up! Do you get nervous about meeting a new psych? I always get a bit jittery haha. I hope this new person ends up being a good match, is someone who helps you to feel safe and understood, and helps to facilitate the change you wanna see in your life. Do feel free to use this space to debrief and stuff too, sometimes it can help us to consolidate our thoughts! 

I hope you do get a good cry soon! Just to be clear, it's not that I'm wanting you to be in a state that makes you want to cry, but more that crying itself is a form of stress release, so I want that relief for you! 😉

Alas, I can only offer a virtual shoulder, but in every way except physical, I am here for you 🫂

Night hun, hopefully catch you soon, it's been nice chatting 😊💜

[Lula]

@Jynx
Am I surprised to know that you are non-binary Jynx ? Yes and no is the answer to that I guess.  I don’t know anyone who identifies as anything but female or male, but of course I know about non-binary etc. etc.  So to me it just is what it is.  All I think about the different ways people identify themselves these days is that it can’t be easy for them in this world.  I’m having a very painful time in this world and I’m female and heterosexual.

I wish you all the best Jynx

[Lula]

@MJG017 

It’s almost 10.40am and already I’m struggling with today, but thanks M.  I so wish I had someone here to talk with.

Have you seen this article on the Daily Mail news website ?

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-13784999/Eminent-scientist-Richard-Dawkins-reveals-f...

The only social media I’m on is Facebook, and very little of that because it’s so toxic.  And I try hard to limit what news I see or hear.

I hope your day is better than mine M

Lula

[MJG017]

Good morning @Lula.  Sorry it's another one you're struggling with.  I was chatting with someone the other day about all the technology young people have these days and how much harder it can makes life harder to deal with mentally.  In our day, if you had a hard time at school, then it was only at school.  I don't mean struggling with the work, but trouble with other students being... 'less than kind'.  We could go home from school every day and get a break from it.  With all this social media everywhere, there can be no break from it whatsoever!  At the other end of the age scale, Ive seen older people upset with hospital staff because they're having issues with appointment times because everything is mobile phones and the internet now and they don't understand how to use it and it stresses them out because they're missing appointments and important information.  So Mr Dawkins probably makes some good points.  I think for at lot of people, the internet brings a lot of improvements to life, it's just a shame that there is a lot of toxicity on it these days, especially with social media which tends to promote it to a certain extend.  Exactly as you pointed out with Facebook.  Now i'm a nice guy... i'm respectful and polite, but even I managed to get myself banned from a facebook group for merely pointing out that a lot of people join a cancer support group when they're distressed and want support... not a friendly 'chit-chat' and a bit of a laugh.  The word 'support' in your group name should provide a clue that I'm right.  But god forbid we can have a polite respectful discussion when one person has the power to remove you at the click of a button.

I know the first time (i've mentioned this before, but not sure if it was with you) I reached out to other people was on an online forum like this one, but specifically for lonely people.  They had a chat room where people who were online could chat to each other in real time.  There was a bunch of us that used it quite a bit... possibly too much time, but that's not the point.  But it was a great way for us to get to know each other a bit and support each other.  I remember that and sometimes wish they had a similar one here.  But the internet is such a different place now from back 14 or 15 years ago, an unmoderated chat room is probably a recipe for disaster these days, especially for people struggling so much mentally.

Again, sorry to hear your having another bad day Lula.  Are there no social groups or something around where you are that you could go to and spend an hour or two with people to talk to?  The local community centre I used to work at had a few groups like that each week which it's members really enjoyed.

[Jynx]

Aww I appreciate your words @Lula it is indeed a challenge at times - but it also comes with a lot of feelings of being.... hmmm, settled, I guess? As in, I am settled within my sense of self; since coming out I have been able to live more authentically. Thank you for your well wishes, I wish you the very best too!! 😊

I am hearing you that you're still feeling isolated and struggling to form some connections! I thought I'd share a list of Social Spaces we have, in case you wanted to check it out. And hmm... Maybe you'd like to meet our dear @Shaz51? (Hi Shaz!! This is Lula!! She's just joined and is looking for some social connections. I thought you two might hit it off! Hope that's ok to tag you 💜)

[Shaz51]

Hello and welcome @Lula 😊

How are you going today 

Thanks for the tag my awesome friend @Jynx 

Must be cuppa time and a chat  @Jynx , @Lula , @MJG017 , @tyme 

 

[Lula]

Thanks for your reply @Jynx.

After I sent my last message to you I realised I had meant to say that however anyone identifies is no one else’s business but their own.

I hope I didn’t come across as critical or judgmental of you in any way, because that is not what I intended.

I am more than happy to hear back from you any time you should want to @Jynx.  It’s all good, you take care too. Being happy is the most important thing for all of us

[Jynx]

I didn't get that at all from your words @Lula but I appreciate that you wanted to take the time to be certain 😊 I have been a few people's 'first' non-binary person they've met, so I'm always happy to answer questions and stuff if they pop up. You've been nothing but gracious 💜

Mmm cuppa sounds lovely @Shaz51!! Are you a coffee person @Lula? Or maybe tea? Hot choccie? hehehe ☕😋