New member here with various issues!

[Storm5]

• Hi all, I have a son in his early 20’s with a 1yo baby. Twice this year he and his partner have broken up for a few days. During this time she goes out in another town with some of her friends. The entire relationship seems a bit toxic. I’m not usually one to say anything much but I’m struggling to hold my tongue, especially towards his partner this time round. She made accusations about my son that are damaging and have encouraged others to put him down and threaten him. Any advice or anyone else going through something similar?

[holdinghope5]

Hello and welcome to the forums @Storm5.

That sounds like a tough spot to be put in. I imagine it must not be easy to see your son go through this, especially when there's a 1-year-old involved. Although I haven't gone through something similar, I do wonder if perhaps looking into some legal advice might be an option, considering that you've mentioned that damaging accusations have been thrown around?

It seems like focusing on being a safe and supportive presence in your son's and his child's life so he feels he can open up and lean on you might be of help too. If he's open to it, he could try chatting with services such as Relationships Australia to get some support around his relationship.

[Storm5]

Thank you for the information. I have, so far, only shown him that he can speak to me, I probably need to be a little more careful about what I say regarding his partner just so he doesn’t shut down. I will pass on the information about Relationships Australia too.  It’s such a mess, he’s actually just resigned from his apprenticeship to move to another town that his partner wanted to go to. He has a job waiting in that town and can finish his apprenticeship but now they’re “off again”, he’s in a bit of a mess.

[holdinghope5]

It's clear you care a lot about him @Storm5, I'm glad he has you looking out for his best interest.

Moving around can be tough, but I have my fingers crossed that he'll be able to finish up his apprenticeship and find work in this new town too. 

[Chew11]

Welcome. I am also new here. But not new to supporting others. Maybe try connecting with a counselor or a peer supporter.

[Appleblossom]

@Storm5 hello! Glad some people have responded. Sorry your son is in a tricky situation with the mother of his child.

Sadly, I also know what it means to watch female based coercive control, against my son. Not pretty! Difficult paths to walk while respecting the needs of all. Yourself and grand child included.  Take care.

[Storm5]

Thank you very much, I agree , it’s a tough gig but I’m confident he will succeed. He just needs to sort out his personal life atm. 

[Storm5]

Thank you very much for the supportive words. It’s nice to hear from someone that has been or is in a similar situation. It’s very hard to watch and not get too involved!

[Storm5]

Thank you I will do!

[Ru-bee]

Hi @Storm5 just a quick forums tip: To make sure that members are notified when you respond to them you can tag them by typing "@" and then selecting their username from the drop down menu. You'll know it's worked when it appears in blue like @Appleblossom @Chew11 @holdinghope5 🙂